Wake up, Major, a stitch on your hat,
You fell out of bed and then you landed in the cash,
So what's in your diary today?
Call on your main man
What can he do for you?
Hang out with stupid, so you can tell him what to do
Major this is your day
Living alone in a jar
Never gets you very far
He can read your mind
Make you feel all right
Sgt Major knows what you want
He knows what you are
One day you'll be a star
Yeah the Major knows what you want
Take out your paper and throw it...
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